Lateral Violence: Understanding It and Healing Together
At OWL Counselling & Wellness, our intention is to support not only individual well-being but also the health of our relationships, workplaces, and communities. Sometimes, the greatest barriers to connection and wellness aren’t visible—they come from within our own groups and relationships. One such barrier is called lateral violence.
Though the term may sound alarming, lateral violence is often subtle, hidden behind words, gestures, or small acts that chip away at trust and belonging. Understanding it, recognizing it, and learning how to address it is essential for our collective well-being.
What Is Lateral Violence?
Lateral violence refers to harmful behaviours between individuals or groups who are on the same level—peers, colleagues, siblings, or community members—rather than directed at someone in a position of authority.
It can take many forms: gossiping, exclusion, undermining someone’s work, subtle intimidation, covert shaming, or public humiliation. While it may not leave a visible bruise, its effects on mental health, group cohesion, and cultural wellness are real and lasting.
A key element of lateral violence is its roots in powerlessness or oppression. Communities or groups that have experienced trauma, discrimination, or systemic oppression may internalize these experiences, sometimes unconsciously directing frustration or anger toward peers rather than outward at the root source of harm.
In other words, lateral violence often emerges when pain, stress, or trauma is displaced internally, rather than resolved collectively or through structural change.
While often discussed in the context of workplaces or Indigenous communities facing historical trauma, the dynamics of "in-group" conflict can also be applied to family units where members may feel a sense of shared experience, power imbalance, or internalized oppression.
How Lateral Violence Shows Up
In Workplaces and Groups
Imagine a healthcare unit, a small office, or a community organization. Lateral violence can show up as:
Colleagues withholding important information.
Gossiping or spreading rumors to undermine someone.
Publicly criticizing or belittling peers.
Excluding certain members from conversations, meetings, or decisions.
Even small, repeated acts—like eye-rolling, sighs of annoyance, or dismissive comments—can erode trust over time. Studies in nursing, for example, show that psychological harassment between peers is far more common than physical aggression and has serious consequences for mental health, job satisfaction, and team performance.
In Communities and Cultures
Lateral violence is not just a workplace issue—it can affect entire communities. In Indigenous communities, for example, lateral violence has been linked to the legacy of colonialism, residential schools, and intergenerational trauma. These historic traumas disrupted traditional teachings, cultural practices, and community cohesion, and the resulting internalized pain can manifest as peer-to-peer aggression.
Think of a tight-knit community where gossip, exclusion, or criticism becomes normalized. The same group that could be a source of support instead becomes a source of stress, eroding trust and cultural connection.
Personal Story Example:
“Maya,” a young professional in a nonprofit organization, noticed that certain colleagues regularly excluded her from emails or meetings. Small comments, like “I thought you already knew,” made her doubt her competence. Over time, the constant subtle undermining affected her confidence and created a sense of isolation. Maya’s story is a common example of how lateral violence quietly infiltrates daily life, impacting mental and emotional well-being.
In Families and Friend Groups
Lateral violence isn’t limited to workplaces—it can occur in families and friend circles as well. Within these close relationships, it may take forms such as:
Persistent criticism, undermining, or “one-upping” siblings, cousins, or friends.
Gossiping or sharing private information to create division.
Excluding certain family members or friends from gatherings, decisions, or conversations.
Using subtle manipulation, passive-aggressiveness, or emotional coercion to control or belittle others.
Because family and friendship bonds are deeply personal, these behaviours can erode trust and emotional safety over time. Children who grow up in households where lateral violence is normalized may carry patterns of internalized stress and conflict into adulthood. Friends may withdraw or experience anxiety and self-doubt when peer exclusion or subtle hostility becomes the norm.
Example Story:
“Alex” grew up in a family where siblings frequently competed for parental attention by putting each other down or spreading gossip. As an adult, Alex noticed these patterns resurfacing in friend groups, creating anxiety and a sense of isolation. Recognizing these behaviours as lateral violence helped Alex set boundaries and seek support, rebuilding trust in relationships.
Why Lateral Violence Happens
Understanding the “why” can help us address it thoughtfully:
Powerlessness and Oppression
Groups that have historically experienced systemic discrimination may unconsciously displace frustration inward, targeting peers instead of the source of oppression.Stress and Burnout
High-stress environments—like hospitals, crisis services, or high-demand workplaces—can create cultures where incivility and peer-to-peer conflict thrive.Cultural Norms and Internalized Behaviours
In some professions, peer conflict is mistakenly normalized as “building resilience”, “manning up”, or “learning the ropes”.Lack of Awareness or Accountability
Because lateral violence occurs among peers rather than from authority figures, it can be dismissed as harmless or “just the way things are”.
The Impact on Well-Being
Individual Impact
Mental health challenges: anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, trauma responses.
Physical health issues: chronic stress can contribute to insomnia, digestive problems, and cardiovascular strain.
Professional burnout: decreased job satisfaction, absenteeism, and disengagement.
Group and Organizational Impact
Breakdown in trust and cohesion: when peers undermine each other, teamwork suffers.
Reduced productivity and increased risk of errors, especially in healthcare and service environments.
Culture of fear or silence: harmful behaviours become normalized and unchallenged.
Cultural or Community Impact
In communities with shared identity or cultural history, lateral violence erodes trust and belonging, disrupting the transmission of cultural knowledge and practices.
Without intervention, cycles of harm perpetuate across generations.
Healing and Prevention: A Wellness Perspective
Addressing lateral violence is not about blame—it’s about awareness, healing, and creating environments of safety and support. Here’s how OWL Counselling & Wellness approaches it:
Awareness and Education
Therapy helps clients recognize patterns of lateral violence in their relationships.
Understanding subtle forms of harm—exclusion, criticism, gossip—helps individuals identify behaviours that may have been normalized over time.
Safe Communication and Boundaries
Therapy provides a structured, judgment-free space to explore experiences of harm.
Client’s practice setting healthy boundaries and communicating assertively with others fostering confidence and self-worth.
Conflict Resolution and Support
Therapists guide clients in addressing relational tensions constructively.
Techniques include respectful feedback, problem-solving, and rebuilding trust in relationships.
Trauma-Informed Healing
Many patterns of lateral violence are connected to past trauma or internalized stress.
Therapy focuses on addressing underlying pain, fostering emotional resilience, and empowering clients to reclaim agency.
Celebrating Positive Relationships and Growth
Therapy emphasizes reinforcing healthy, supportive behaviours in relationships.
Highlighting moments of collaboration, kindness, and connection encourages lasting relational wellness.
Moving Toward Collective Wellness
Lateral violence may be hidden, but its impact is real. It disrupts relationships, diminishes confidence, and erodes community trust. Yet it is possible to heal and build cultures of wellness, belonging, and resilience.
At OWL Counselling & Wellness, we believe that by recognizing lateral violence, naming it, and working together to transform culture, we can foster environments where individuals and groups thrive.
Whether you’re navigating workplace tension, community conflict, family or peer challenges, addressing lateral violence is not just about ending harm—it’s about cultivating safety, trust, and connection for everyone.
Healing starts with awareness.
Change begins with conversation.
And wellness grows when we move forward together.
Aaron Sinclair, RP, ICADC, CCS-AC
Registered Psychotherapist, Owner
References
Native Women’s Association of Canada. “Aboriginal Lateral Violence.” 2011. NWAC PDF
CSVANW. “Lateral Violence.” CSVANW
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC/NIOSH). “Worker-on-Worker Violence (Type 3).” CDC
Relias. “What Is Lateral Violence in Nursing?” Relias
PMC. Work place incivility, lateral violence, and bullying among nurses. PMC
SBS/NITV. “What is lateral violence and how do we deal with its many forms?” SBS
Johns Hopkins School of Nursing. “Lateral Violence in the Workplace.” JHU Nursing
Vistelar. “Lateral Violence as Part of Workplace Violence.”